Rishta the most important thing in our culture for both the genders not only females but males as well kind of most horrendous toxic and torturous thing in our lives.
In a desi household precisely in all brown families getting an appropriate rishta for their children is not less than a hunt and it start at the time of birth. A child is born and that baby receive duas of ACHAE NASEEB and that too in the meaning of ACHA RISHTA who knew that ACHAE NASEEB are only limited ton ACHA RISHTA and that too for a baby who is just born.
In our society we first set a standard that who are eligible for being our daughter in law or son in law . Most important things that are considered mostly consist of all superficial things for girls specifically for example:
Fair complexion (dark personality is OK)
Heighted enough (low moral values are okay)
Rich background (empty from feelings is okay)
Professional degree holder (because yeah you have to stay at home and you’re in laws can brag about it)
And the list never ends …
Because yes we need a CHAND SE BAHU.There comes the question that who are not CHAAND SE are not eligible for marriage or any happiness??
After this scrutiny that is more than an immigration scrutiny when they finalize a right then comes DOWRY. If they cannot afford even the simplest of household items then why they are even eligible for your daughter to spend whole of the life. See the hypocrisy of this toxic rishta culture.
In Pakistan Marriage is about every single person other than the couple itself and its pathetic. We value a unit more than individual itself because here we do not understand that marriage is about companionship.
Here in our country if a girl is older than 25 every single person around her will be like HAWWW HAEE.Because ACHA RISHTA is the biggest accomplishment in life and that too in an early age if not then you are a looser no matter what your abilities are no matter what you have achieved you are looser in the society.
This RISHTA CULTURE needs to get evolved because it’s toxic and then leads towards a toxic marriage that do not ends well.
According to myself here in our culture women are the biggest enemies of other women because they go out for finding perfect RISHTA they see their daughters and reject them because they are not conventionally KHOOBSURAT and this is the real mental torture you can give to someone and to their whole family by lowering their self-esteem.
By Rabbia Mustafa: Via Metronome